Query Critique #3: The Saints of Belvedere Road

Darke Conteur is up today, so please leave your thoughts in the comment section.  Remember: all snark will be instantly incinerated!  Spread the word so Darke can get tons of helpful feedback!

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Dear [agent name]

Amelia Saint thinks she’s losing her mind.

Demonic visions have left Amelia doubting her sanity. When she learns her husband has bargained away the soul of their eldest child to make partner at his law firm, her sanity isn‘t the only thing she could lose. Worse, she learns Henry plans to bargain the souls of their two remaining children to fulfill his political aspirations.

With help from strangers adept in the occult, she discovers a way to keep her children alive. If Amelia can prevent the minions of Hell from taking full possession of her son’s body for seventy-two hours, both pacts will be broken and Henry will be forced to take his son’s place in Hell.

Henry knows this too.

Amelia must try to stay one step ahead, but as the deadline approaches and the forces of Hell close in, her options for keeping her children alive run out.

The Saints of Belvedere Road is a 70,000 word, paranormal thriller. I was a member of Online Writer’s Workshop for three years, and was a content editor for Flash Me Magazine since ‘08. I spent a year on the Community Editorial Board for my local newspaper, where my editorials were published every two months.

Thank-you for your time and consideration.

Darke Conteur

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Leave your comments below, and be sure to keep your eyes peeled for more queries!  Everyday for the next two weeks, I’ll be posting another query, and it’s up to YOU all to help each other.  Thanks, friends and fellow writers!!

🙂