How to Write Romance, Part 3: Scene-Level Romantic Tension
Last week, I discussed the importance of fatal flaws (and strengths) in romanceย (I also talked about hate-at-first sight on the NaNoWriMo blog!). This week, I want to look at what all of this stuff means on a scene-level. Like, how do we bring the romance to life in an actual scene?
It’s All About the Feelings
Consider this: when we read a book, we root for the people–not the events through which they move. Though we’re all curious about who killed Veronica Mars’s best friend, the reason we keep watching the show is because we care about Veronica.
Like, have you ever watched a wild action scene on TV that made you feel nothing? That in fact, left you totally bored? Well, the reason you didn’t care was because you weren’t connected to the characters. You weren’t invested in whether the heroine made it out of the giant explosion alive, so all those special effects were just wasted eye candy.
All of this applies to romance too. Gratuitous sex scenes aren’t gratuitous if we care about the characters and have been waiting for them to get together. So, in order toย care about the romantic events unfolding on the page, we must first care about the characters. And even then, it’s still less about the events and more about how the events make the character (and reader) feel.
So remember: if the reader doesn’t care about the character, then the reader won’t keep reading.
Deep Point of View
One of the best way to make your reader feel something is to put your heroine (or hero) to filter the story’s conflict through the character’s POV. More importantly, you want to give us the POV for whichever character has the most at stake.
If you’ve ever read adult romance, then you’ve seen this done before. Whenever the lovers are together, whoever is beings pushed toward the most is the POV we’re in. And it’s not just surface level, but DEEP point-of-view. We feel everything the character feels as events unfold. We feel how the hero’s insistence that our heroine push herself harder makes her angry and uncomfortable. Then we see how she leaves the scene–after pushing herself harder–changed by the events.
Of course, if your book has only one POV, then you’re limited to that one person’s growth. As such, you’ll want to make sure that every scene with the protagonist + love interest is pushing the protagonist toward growth.
So remember: deep point of view with high stakes doth the reader’s interest make.
Push and Pull in Action
In E.M. Forster’s A Room With a View, we’re limited to only Lucy Honeychurch’s POV. Although, the book is an omniscient narrator, we still get a solid sense of what Lucy is feeling. Plus, we see how each scene (and the two love interests) pushes her in a good (or bad) direction.
Here’s a scene with George, the “good” love interest who pushes Lucy to reach her inner need:
In this scene, Lucy has just witnessed a murder and fainted (in true Edwardian style) into our hero’s arms. She is not only disturbed by the murder, but she’s disturbed by how George Emerson reacts to it. Everything he and his father say to her–about living life with passion and asking eternal questions–confuses her. Yet for the first time so far in the book, she’s actuallyย slightly open to what he’s telling her. So when he says, “I shall want to live, I say,” she doesn’t take her usual approach of condescension or retreat. Instead, she joins him on the parapet and contemplates “…the River Arno, whose roar was suggesting some unexpected melody to her ears.”
Additionally, notice how we’re shown what Lucy feels (although not through deep, limited POV–this is an omniscient narrator, as was popular back then). We seeย Lucy’s discomfort as well as her growing warmth for George, and we, the readers, like that she’s been forced outside of her comfort zone. As such, we’re excited for the next time George comes around.
Now you tell me: How do you develop scene-level romantic tension? Or, what are some of your favorite romance scenes in fiction?
Stephanie
July 18, 2014 @ 8:56 pm
Thanks for posting this! Both types of narration seem to have their challenges; choosing who’s POV in third person to use, or amping up the pressure to change in first person or limited POV.
Susan Dennard
July 22, 2014 @ 12:13 am
They definitely have their challenges! I find that every freaking time I write a new book–3rd person is especially hard for me until I’ve really found my character’s voice. ๐
Rosanna Silverlight
July 19, 2014 @ 10:54 am
Great post, Sooz! I’m going to apologise in advance for what will be a LONG comment. Sorry! I guess I just love dissecting romance in books?!
“So remember: if the reader doesn’t care about the character, then the reader won’t keep reading.”
I totally agree with this! Even the most ‘love/attraction at first sight’ romance needs conflict and character growth, to answer the reader’s question of why they should care.
Althea and Brashen from Robin Hobb’s Liveship Traders trilogy popped into my head as the perfect example of characters who push each other towards growth – and sometimes pull apart. Like, if you didn’t believe these two were meant to be together you could easily believe they’d never speak to each other again. :-/ Hobb’s character development is incredible and kind of awe-inspiring when you about it. She has so much to draw from with Althea and Brashen – so many factors that would influence their push/pull relationship.
With my own fiction, I’m working on the push-pull towards character growth as I edit the romance scenes (I was reading through one scene and a red flag appeared in my head when I realised I’d missed an opportunity for my MC to call out my male protagonist on his Wounded Male Pride behaviour), and I’m also trying to amp up the tension by having my main character imagine what she would like to happen, which is often different from what actually happens. ๐ There’s plenty of hesitation and doubt, so I’m describing that, too. Ultimately, I’m trying not to go overboard with any of it, because I want my romance to be a real slow burner, and I DEFINITELY don’t want it to jump the shark. ๐
I recently read The Winner’s Curse by Marie Rutkoski … and I adored the romantic tension because she NAILS deep POV, and the stakes are so incredibly high. It made Kestrel and Arin’s push-pull on each other all the more nail-biting, and all the more rewarding. And the ending of the book? Well, it kind of broke me. ;_;
Susan Dennard
July 22, 2014 @ 12:13 am
Althea and Brashen!!! I LOVE THEM FOREVER!!! They ARE the best example ever of characters growing and pushing. All of the romances in that series are. Have you ever read Sharon Shinn? Her books also have incredible romantic growth.
I have to say I was disappointed by The Winner’s Curse. But that’s just because I never had a good sense of setting or why anything in the world was the way it was. Interestingly, I was so angry about the lack of world-building in it that I ended up revising TRUTHWITCH one more time–just to make sure that I wasn’t making those same mistakes. And obviously, this is just MY personal preference for rich, detailed fantasy worlds that I can vividly imagine. Clearly this book is intentionally a sparse world kinda read–that’s just not what I go for. ๐
Ohhhhhh overboard on the hesitation/doubt and tension. I am DEFINITELY guilty of that. Or of having all this tension in actions but not enough explanation/emotional stuff to back it up–so that the reader ultimately feels none of what I want them to feel! This was also something I tried to really work on in TRUTHWITCH (and Rutkoski did do an excellent job with the scene-level tension! I agree on that!).
Have you read Megan Whalen Turner? Her romance–asdfadfadfasfas. So subtle and slow-burn, but ASDFASDFASFSAD. I love it. ๐
Rosanna Silverlight
July 22, 2014 @ 7:33 am
LOL! How can I ignore an ASDFASDFASDF recommendation? Since finishing The Winner’s Curse I’ve been desperate for more fantasy so I will DEFINITELY look her up, plus Sharon Shinn. Thanks! ๐
I’m not sure what made me love The Winner’s Curse so much. I could have done with a map! I think it was that the stakes of the world came through in the way the characters acted, so they seemed believable, even if the world itself was a little thinly described.
I’m glad you said it made you revise TRUTHWITCH one more time (seriously, EVERY TIME you mention it I get excited!) because at the moment I have a HUGE to-do list piling up on stuff I need to go over in my novel, and world building is high-high-HIGH on that list. It’s comforting to know that I can break my list down into as many extra passes as I need, rather than trying to nail it all at once. (It’s stupidly easy to forget that, during writing and revisions, you are basically god, and can do as many do-overs as you need! XD)
*Holds up hand* Yep, I do the tension in actions/not enough explanation, or worse, INSTA-LOVE/ATTRACTION. I’m reading my earlier draft and can see my past romantic-writer-self going “Yes but these two are MEANT to be together!!” and my current editor-self is going “Show me how!!”
So, the romance is still a HUGE work in progress, but I’m picking up a TON of ideas from your posts on how to improve it. ๐
sarujin
July 21, 2014 @ 12:44 am
I love your whole How to Write Romance post series! It’s actually how I stumbled upon your blog in the first place – through your NaNoWriMo post.
I watch a lot of romantic comedy, mostly kdrama and jdrama, but I don’t *read* a lot of romance. What I do tend to read is fantasy where the romance is a sub-plot, so I’m struggling with writing those heart-stoppingly intense scenes where characters almost touch, or almost kiss, or the hero turns away even though he really, really wants to stay with the girl because he thinks it’s better for her and everyone starts crying… you know the kind of scenes I’m talking about. It always sounds too cheesy, or to adult romance novel-y, or too much like stage directions.
Do you have any advice? Is it coming up in a later installment of this awesome series of blog posts?
Susan Dennard
July 22, 2014 @ 12:06 am
Hmmm, that’s what I call scene-level tension and it’s what I was trying to discuss in this post. ๐ Maybe that wasn’t clear.
The key is to have your characters behave TRUE TO CHARACTER. As I keep saying, the romance is defined by how your characters need to grow. So for example, in my SOMETHING STRANGE & DEADLY series, Daniel Sheridan doesn’t think he’s worthy of Eleanor Fitt. So, he’ll keep turning away (just like you describe!) until he realizes he IS worthy of her.
If the character arc, however, were for the hero to learn humility (maybe he’s all arrogance!), then he’ll keep pushing our heroine and leaning into her until he eventually realizes that ISN’T how to get her. He needs to tone down his arrogance and proceed with more humility.
Does that make sense?
sarujin
July 22, 2014 @ 3:42 am
That totally makes sense!
I think maybe my question wasn’t super clear… I’m talking more about word choices, and how much description is too much. I trained to be an actress for a while, so I can visualize action pretty easily. But even though I can see the scene in my head really clearly, I have trouble getting it down on paper so that other people see/feel the same thing I do. It tends to either go TMI (bodice ripper style which generally isn’t appropriate in my stories lol) or sort of clinical… Of course, the couple of romance-y novels I’ve enjoyed are set in Regency or Victorian England (A Convenient Marriage!!!), so my idea of what language to use might be a little outdated. lol
Also, thanks for the reply! I know you must be super busy! <3
Susan Dennard
July 22, 2014 @ 4:09 am
Actually I can give you a little tip that someone once told me. For every 2-3 actions, make sure you give an emotional reaction. So for example, he might cup her chin and kiss her jawbone, and then she thinks about how her heart is hammering against the top of her skull. She might then dig her fingers in his back and turn her lips into his…then, of course, we have her think about how this is it! What she’s been waiting for!
Does that little formula make sense? It’s by no means necessary, but it does help me avoid the clinical make-out/sex scene OR the overly emotional/melodramatic scene.
sarujin
July 22, 2014 @ 4:18 am
Yeah! That totally makes sense! Thanks so much! <3
And thanks for being so sweet to all of us aspiring writers out here in cyberspace. You totally go above and beyond!
Sarah Gleason
July 25, 2014 @ 3:08 am
Just discovered your wonderful blog with all of these great resources for writers — even the baby ones like me just starting out! Thank you so much for investing the time to write these great articles, they’ve helped me revamp and rethink some of my characters and their relationships and plot points.
Thank you, thank you ๐
Favorite romance scenes in fiction: So many to choose from but one that comes to mind is the very end of Daughter of the Forrest by Juliet Marillier. So much had been culminating between the two main characters and she [Juliet] handled everything so beautifully.
Susan Dennard
July 25, 2014 @ 3:44 pm
Oh my gosh, I LOVE HER BOOKS!!! Son of Shadows is one of my most favorite romances of all times–with Daughter of the Forest being a verrrry close second. She does the character growth through romance SO WELL!!!
Sarah Gleason
July 25, 2014 @ 9:24 pm
The whole series its on my re-read shelf ๐ Sorcha & Hugh and Liadan & Bran are some of my favorite fictional relationships. Talk about torturing your protagonists and the horrible, but great villains/antagonists. Makes me smile thinking about it. Need to read them again soon!
Cassandra Black
October 25, 2014 @ 9:40 pm
Thank you for a great piece. Stumbled upon it in my search to build romantic tension. It’s particularly challenging in a sequel because “happily ever after” is hard to trump after everyday life comes into play with the characters in part 2. You’ve given me some great reminders and further insight. Thank you again. Cassandra Black
Susan Dennard
October 25, 2014 @ 11:46 pm
Oh yay! I’m so glad it was helpful to you, Cassandra!
Janine Tsang
May 24, 2015 @ 10:31 am
Romance is actually really hard to write.
But I prefer not to write romance/s in my novels; most of them are just cookies that never become anything but xD
Though this makes SO much sense ๐