Community Critique Party

Query Critique Day: Travel Memoirs

Time for some community feedback!

It’s that time again!!

Time for you all to help me out by critiquing a shiny, revised query that has been wrung through the Query Day wringer.

For August, our lucky “winner” is Wendy, who will be querying her travel memoirs soon! This is our first non-fiction query on here (woo!), so I’m excited to hear what everyone thinks.

And as always, be HELPFUL, be gentle, and leave your comments below.

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Dear Ms. Dennard,

I’ve shacked up with a counterfeiter in a forest in Rio. Woken up accidentally engaged in Santo Domingo. Hitched a Secret Service Humvee in Jordan. Filmed Cuban cigar traffickers in Havana. Crashed a Cadillac in Hollywood. Escaped a foot fetishist in Hanoi. Encountered men and other wild animals in Africa. And I’ve written 70,000 words about it that I’ll never show my grandmother. (Read more…)

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17 comments

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Query Critique Day: Thirst

Time for some community feedback!

It’s that time again!!

Time for you all to help me out by critiquing a shiny, revised query that has been wrung through the Query Day wringer.

For June, we have our second lucky “winner”, Katharine Owens (a.k.a. The Insect Collector).

As always, be HELPFUL, be gentle, and leave your comments below.

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Dear Agent that I have researched and found is a great match for me,

Sixteen-year-old Nile coasts through life in Camp Hope, the interim community built by the survivors of a massive climate shift. He’s almost finished with career training and head over heels for his girlfriend. Life is good. (Read more…)

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32 comments

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Query Critique Day: Stormland

♥ Time for some community feedback! ♥

It’s that time again!!

For June’s Query Day, we have our first lucky “winner”, Sharon Bayliss. Her shiny, revised query is now ready for some group feedback!

As always, be HELPFUL, be gentle, and leave your comments below.

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Dear Ms. Agent,

I’ve read in interviews that you enjoy fantasy set in a world similar to our own, so I believe you will enjoy my 70,000 word fantasy, STORMLAND.

The sky looked black for days after the bomb killed her parents, and Lena Lowell will do anything to make sure the sky stays blue from now on. (Read more…)

Speak up:

10 comments

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Query Critique Day: This Year Sucks

♥ Time for some community feedback! ♥

MaryAnn Kempher is the second lucky “winner” from May’s Query Day, and so her shiny, revised query is now ready for some group feedback!

As always, be HELPFUL, be gentle, and leave your comments below.

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Dear Agent,

I believe my book and what you are currently looking for may be a perfect match because <insert reason why>. THIS YEAR SUCKS has 60,000 words and is romantic suspense.

If not for a sleepless night and an empty pantry, Katherine might never have seen a killer and his victim. She didn’t get a good look at him, but he doesn’t know that. Now she’s a hunted woman. (Read more…)

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11 comments

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Query Critique Day: Magnetic

♥ Time for some community feedback! ♥

Jeanmarie Anaya is the first lucky “winner” from May’s Query Day, and so her shiny, revised query is now ready for some group feedback!

As always, be HELPFUL, be gentle, and leave your comments below.

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Dear __________:

I enjoyed hearing you speak at the Backspace Agent-Author Seminar in November on the topic of recent trends in the YA market. You mentioned you were interested in paranormal YA. I hope my novel, MAGNETIC, will fit your list. (Read more…)

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8 comments

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Query Critique Day: Dreaming Up My Brother

♥ Time for some community feedback! ♥

Yahong Chi was the lucky second “winner” from March’s Query Day, and so her shiny, revised query is now ready for some group feedback!

As always, be HELPFUL, be gentle, and leave your comments below.

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Dear [agent]:

Fourteen-year-old Georgia Castleforté knows the secrets dreams can yield. How could she not, with renowned shrinks as parents? But for Georgia to dream up a long-lost brother, now that’s pretty major; even more so when her parents brush her off and don’t even pull her into one of their “dream interpretation” sessions. Something’s up. Georgia’s determined to figure out if she actually does have a brother and, more importantly, why her parents wouldn’t want her to know.

But when the clues in her dream world show Georgia that her parents sacrificed her brother in a deal for something more dear to them than a human being, her beliefs and family foundations blow up beneath her. (Read more…)

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19 comments

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Query Critique Day: The Labyrinth of Middle Realm

♥ Time for some community feedback! ♥

Jo Hart was the lucky first “winner” from March’s Query Day, and so her shiny, revised query is now ready for some group feedback!

As always, be HELPFUL, be gentle, and leave your comments below.

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THE LABYRINTH OF MIDDLE REALM is a 62,000 word young adult fantasy.

While trying to choose a fantasy novel from her bookshelf one day during the summer holidays, fourteen-year-old Katie is thrust into a realm just like the fantasy worlds of the novels she loves. She soon realises there’s nothing magical about hiking through thick forests without food, battling dark beasts with a taste for human flesh or facing off against soldiers of a tyrannical sorceress (with a weapon she barely knows how to use). In fact, it’s downright scary. (Read more…)

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15 comments

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Presenting…Query Day!

Query Critique Week was such a huge success (I can’t even count how many people have emailed me saying they had full requests! YAAAAY!!), and I’ve received so many emails asking when it would happen again, I’ve decided to make it more of a regular thing…

Now, I can’t manage the same scale of queries I handled in January, but I CAN manage a handful each month.  And so I’d like to introduce you to…

~ Query Day ~ (Read more…)

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38 comments

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Query Critique Wrap-Up

GAH!  Yesterday I reached 100 followers! This is momentous — MOMENTOUS, I SAY!  I feel so very loved.

😀

♥ THANK YOU, FRIENDS! ♥

Now back to our regularly scheduled program: my Query Critique Week(s) is coming to a close — though there’s still another week of it on Let the Words Flow (with agent feedback!).

I critiqued a total of 25 queries, and I wanted to give a quick overview of some of the various issues I saw.

Biggest Issues

By biggest, I mean “most harmful”. These are the issues that mean instant death for your query. Think “box jellyfish of the query world”. (Read more…)

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25 comments

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Query Critique #10: Run, Delaney

Today’s query is our last, and it’s from a beginning writer — in other words, BE GENTLE.  While everyone has been offering amazing feedback, we can all come across harsh if we’re not careful.

So try to be helpful but sweet for this newbie — it’s her first attempt at querying!

🙂

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Dear Agent,

<insert special comments for agent> As such, I believe you’ll enjoy my 50,000 word YA urban fantasy novel RUN, DELANEY. Delaney is a teen werewolf and mother, on the run from her pack and its leader Sable, who’s also the father of her child.

Deep in the woods of the Tyson County Forest, live three packs: the Solar, the Schulsia, and the Secchi. Delaney leads a content life as a Solar pack member until one fateful night when her home, the Solar Compound is attacked with fire by an unknown enemy. Enter Sable: a charismatic rogue bearing promises to protect the traumatized Solar. He wins the title of Pack Leader and forces Delaney to be his mate. She learns of his ties to the mysterious enemy, and her own bloodline connection to their schemes. (Read more…)

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10 comments

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